Some Things That Happened Over the Weekend

  • I got stuck long enough on a pontoon boat in the middle of the lake to seriously consider jumping into the cold water. It was basically like the trailer for Life of Pi (I never actually saw the movie).
  • While in the bathroom (I swear this won’t get graphic) I noticed a giant, multicolored spider from the bowels of hell crawling towards me on my shoulder. I am slightly concerned that my instinct told me to run into the hallway half naked screaming.
  • After the spider incident, I had vodka on the rocks. Like a champ.

I am hoping this week is much less eventful.

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